Rebuilding trust in a once vibrant and trusting relationship can be one of the hardest things to do once one of the partners breaks and compromises the same trust.
Many people do not know how to go about mending the broken pieces and putting the relationship back to where it was before the loss of trust. There is that feeling that maybe the other partner will not even accept an apology and any explanation to patch things up.
There is however need to try and by following the 10 steps below, any relationship can easily go back to what it was before the breach of trust.
How To Rebuild Trust In a Relationship:
1. Retrace Back To What Caused The Rift:
Before trying to find any solutions, think hard about what brought about the rift between you two. Was it something you said or did or something you did not say or did not do? Once you discover what the cause was, then it will be much easier to move forward with an apology plan especially if you were the cause of the problem.
Once you have realized that you were in the wrong, the best thing to do is swallow your pride and sincerely apologize for whatever you did. A sincere apology means so much and very few people will say no to that. Do not apologize for the sake of patching things up but for the sake of making the second time round last.
3. Be Truthful:
For every relationship to work, it has to be based on truth. Any lies or half-truths told will make a good situation escalate to a very bad one once the other party discovers that everything was based on a lie.
Being truthful brings about confidence and being confident in one another is one of the basis of a good relationship. So if you want to build trust again, stick to the truth always.
4. Work On Your Behavior, Character And Attitude:
Some of us have such big egos that nothing anyone else says makes sense to us. Now that is very wrong. If you want to rebuild trust in a relationship, work on your character traits and change your negative behavior completely.
Pay attention and do not assume a high headedness attitude every time you think your partner is wrong. Listen, weigh the situation or the words, then politely answer back.
5. Be Open Minded:
Nothing hurts a relationship than hiding things from your partner. If you are looking for ways to rebuild your trust, start by being open to your partner. Hiding important information especially about yourself can bring so much harm later when the other person discovers that you have stuff you are not letting out. It is always good to share your happiness and worries.
Forgiveness should probably be on top of the list of things to do in order to rebuild trust in a relationship. If you do not learn how to forgive your partner for past mistakes, then there is no way you will move forward.
Accepting that a mistake occurred and moving on without forgiving the act is like saying, “well, I do not have a choice, so let us unwillingly move on”. Forgiveness brings with it healing and eases any heartaches. Though it might seem a hard thing to do, holding in anger and grudges costs people many happy moments together.
7. Listen More And Talk Less:
If you do all the talking in a relationship and never once give your partner a chance to have their say, then the relationship will not go far. If you want to rebuild your tryst, then do away with the controlling factor. Listen more to what you collaborates says because they too are part of the relationship.
Be the person that listens more and only speaks when need be. This does not mean you completely go mute on every discussion. It means you do not take over every conversation or activity as if you are the only one in the relationship.
8. Be Careful With Your Interaction With The Opposite Sex:
Therefore, you flirt occasionally with the people of the opposite sex without caring about what your partner thinks. Now this is very wrong. When you are in the presence of your partner, be very careful how you interact with people of the opposite sex.
You cannot rebuild trust if you continue flirting as if it is all right to do so. Think about the other person’s feelings and what harm your actions are doing to their ego and self-esteem.
9. Let Bygones Be Bygones:
This could still be on the line of forgiveness. Once you decide to forgive a partner for their past mistakes, do not open up old wounds. Let the past remain in the past. Every time you keep reminding them about the painful past, you will open up new wounds, which might take time to heal again.
Do not let your renewed trust dwell on what took place. You are driving a new vessel now, so let it grow by letting bygones be bygones.
10. Seek Counseling:
Some of the hurt may have occurred due to betray, depression, infidelity and other causes. If you two sit, down and see no solution to rebuilding the trust, then seek professional help. A counsellor or a close confidant may help with the situation.
Talking about what brought about the conflict to begin with helps with the healing process. Dealing with it and finding solutions with the help of a therapist or a certified counsellor will objectively help to come to the bottom of the issue and handle the issues at hand better.
Time heals all wounds as the saying goes. Take time to understand your partner better before rushing back into anything. Respect, forgiveness, being truthful and loving one another is important factors to consider in rebuilding trust. Keep all lines of communication between you two open always if you want a healthy relationship.
This should be the case every time you are together or apart. The above factors and many more can help in bringing back a healthy and trustworthy relationship.
What have you done to help rebuild a relationship that has really stood out to you? Was it easy for you? Was it overwhelming? Leave your comments.